Family Dinner

"The shared meal elevates eating from a mechanical process of fueling the body to a ritual of family and community, from mere animal biology to an act of culture."

-Michael Pollan (In Defense of Food: An Eater's Manifesto, p. 192)

Family dinner is very important in our house. It is a time to nourish our bodies and souls. Lately, family dinners have become one of my favorite times of the day as everyone seems to be in such a wonderful mood. At 7 months, Milo is observing all of us eating and slowly getting the hang of putting food into his mouth. He sits across the table from Ella and watches her every move and often ends up with a huge smile or a gigantic laugh. And Ella, at almost 4, loves all the attention that Milo gives to her.

We have found that our daughter actually eats much better and is more inclined to try new foods when she sees us eat them so family dinners encourage her to try new foods. She is in a very picky stage right now but we make sure to place all that is for dinner on serving platters and allow Ella to serve herself. This gives Ella the choice of what to eat and how much to eat. We started to do this after I read Child of Mine: Feeding with Love and Good Sense by Ellyn Satter. In her book, Satter talks about the importance of giving children opportunities to eat healthy food and allowing them to make the choice of what and how much to eat. This does not mean that you make your children a separate meal just for them, rather you set the food out on the table and allow children the opportunity to serve themselves based on what looks good to them and how hungry they feel. It feels like it is a wonderful way to encourage healthy eating habits. Since we have started doing this, Ella actually tries more foods because she feels like she has control over what she is eating. She doesn't eat everything, but she is getting much better at trying something and then telling us if she likes it or if she does not.

Another wonderful part of family dinners is the conversation. Ella loves to tell stories and we all talk about our days. We have a tradition of doing our "Highs and Lows" at dinner time. Everyone gets to talk about their high point and low point of the day. When we first started this, Ella was about three. She would often say that her high or low was the same as one of ours. But over the past year, she has been able to start articulating her high and low point of the day and and explanation of why. The tradition has been a really great way for to help Ella explore her feelings and learn how to express them in a constructive way. It has been a great way to talk about struggles she has had and explore different paths. "Highs and Lows" started out as a nice way of sharing moments from our day but has turned into a valuable learning experience for all of us.

Family dinner is a really special time in our house right now and I cherish every moment. It is a struggle to get dinner on the table by 5:30 or 6pm and for my husband to get home by then but we make every effort we can to make it happen as we feel it is extremely important. And the smiles and laughter that light up our dinner table fill me with pure joy!